My twins graduated from high school this week.
Just typing that sentence brings up a wave of emotion I didn’t quite expect. I’m so proud of them—of who they are and who they’re becoming. But I also know what’s ahead. The incredible, messy, unpredictable adventure of becoming an adult.
As they tossed their caps and hugged their friends goodbye, I felt this deep urge to give them something more than a gift or a card. I wanted to give them something lasting. Something real. So I wrote them a letter.
It was a letter filled with the truths I wish I knew when I was 18. Some I’ve learned the hard way. Some I’m still learning, again and again. I’m sharing those lessons here because I think they’re not just for new graduates. They’re for all of us…especially those of us in the middle of life, leadership, or change.
So, whether you’re heading into college, stepping into a new season, or just trying to navigate the weirdness of being human, here are 10 life lessons I’ve come to believe with my whole heart:
1. There’s very little you can control.
We try to control things because we want to feel safe or certain. But most of life doesn’t unfold according to plan, and that’s okay. The magic is often in what you don’t plan for. Letting go doesn’t mean giving up. It means trusting yourself enough to meet whatever comes next.
2. You’ll never feel “ready.”
The best opportunities tend to show up before we feel prepared. Say yes anyway. Growth happens in the stretch.
3. Say “yes.”
Say yes to the invite, the walk, the weird class, the road trip, the conversation that scares you. Say yes to yourself. Life opens up when we do.
4. Learn to set boundaries.
You are not responsible for everyone else’s comfort or expectations. Every “yes” you give is also a “no” to something else—make sure it’s not always a “no” to yourself.
5. Kindness matters most.
You can be brilliant and talented, but if you’re not kind, none of it will stick. As Maya Angelou said, “People may forget your words, but they’ll remember how you made them feel.”
6. It’s okay to be alone.
You don’t have to fill every quiet space. Learn to enjoy your own company. Get to know who you are when no one’s watching.
7. Keep the relationship with your siblings.
They’ve known you longer than almost anyone—and if you’re lucky, they’ll be with you when no one else is. Protect those bonds.
8. Failure is good.
You don’t grow from playing it safe. The best stories come from detours, rejections, and the moments that didn’t go as planned. Life is not linear. The good stuff lives in the curves.
9. You can start over anytime.
You don’t need permission. If something no longer fits, shift. Change your mind. Begin again.
10. You are not your resume.
Or your GPA, your job title, your relationship status, or your follower count. You are already enough, just as you are. The world needs you, not the performance of you.
I don’t know what paths my children will take or what challenges they’ll face. But I hope these lessons give them a little more courage, grace, and self-trust.
And I hope they remind you—wherever you are in your journey—that it’s never too late to choose a different path, speak your truth, or come back to yourself.
We’re all still learning. Still becoming.
And that’s the whole point.